You make plans to live this amazing life. Amazing career, Kids, car & hey let’s not forget the dog. That all you think of as you become an adult. What you DO NOT plan for is losing one of your children. Literally just got married 3 weeks before.
On the morning of June 8,2016 we had a check up and sonogram appointment to check on our little sunshine. This day it just so happened my husband couldn’t get off of work so he couldn’t come with me. Either way i was excited because we was finally 16 weeks and i was going to know if it was a he or she. I was going to see how much he grew. I was going to see his little face. His little heart. Arrived 9:30 sharp. I laid down to get my regular work up. the nurse is searching for a heart beat and eventually we found one. Very faint but we just knew that was it. The nurse says “This machine isn’t that good, lets just finish up and get you over to sono. Your going to hear it better then”. As we start the sonogram i see how big he got with a head like his dad i said to the doctor. To be honest i was so in love and with all joy i felt i never realized she wasn’t responding to anything i was saying. She said excuse me give me a min. Walked out and came back 5min later.
At this point I’m laying down thinking why the heck is this lady taking so long like I’m not laying here with this cold gel on my big belly. 5 minutes later she walks in with my actual doctor who had this look on his face and that’s when i knew something was wrong AGAIN. 2 weeks before we had been told our baby would be born with his Gastroschisis. It’s a birth defect of the abdominal (belly) wall. The baby's intestines are found outside of the baby's body, exiting through a hole beside the belly button. That was just something we were going to have to deal with as parents. That was the least of out worries.
Our baby had NO heart beat!!! All i could do was hear the doctor say “Mrs.Lewis I’m deeply sorry” everything else went black. I don’t know how long later but all I wanted to do was call my husband. Not knowing how to tell his our baby was gone. He finally made it to me after being told this news at work. My mom, my best friend, and pops all made it to comfort us in our time of need. The doctor spoke to us as a family because he knew me from a little girl. He gave us the option terminating sedated and not seeing the baby or inducing labor and giving birth naturally to see him. We chose to give birth natural.
May 9, 2016 we gave birth to our handsome baby boy
Jonathon Lee Lewis Jr.
This was NOT the plan. No one said this could happen. Our lives got turned upside down. We have 2 living children but that didn’t stop the hurt. Nothing eased the pain. 2019 we still hurt, we still feel that pain. We still have that emptiness. Let’s break the silence!!!!!!!!