On the morning of Tuesday, July 5, I called the doctor concerned because I hadn’t been feeling as much movement as had become normal in my pregnancy. They had us come in for an appointment, and after a non-stress test (NST), doppler, and ultrasound, we were told that our precious baby boy no longer had a heartbeat, and that we would need to head to the hospital later in the afternoon for delivery. We went home, called and texted family and friends, packed an overnight bag, and headed to the hospital to deliver our sweet boy who would no longer be with us. After four days, multiple rounds of drugs and attempts to induce labor with no success, we ended up delivering Alexander Scott Haligowski into the arms of Jesus at 7:36am on Saturday, July 9 by a scheduled c-section. Everything about him was perfect. 5 lbs 13 oz and 20 inches long. We learned during the delivery that his death was the result of an umbilical cord accident–two true knots in his cord that had tightened together and cut off his flow of oxygen and nutrients to stay alive. We spent time on Saturday saying “hello” and “goodbye” to our precious boy, holding him tight, telling him how much we love him, introducing him to his grandparents and Aunt Kristen & Uncle Rob, and memorizing everything about him that we could before giving him back into the arms of Jesus.

We love Alexander so so much. We miss him every moment of every day. Life has been incredibly difficult in the past month, and we are slowly and gently learning to live in a new normal that is not at all how we imagined our life.