I’m thrilled (and only mildly concerned for my well-being) to be participating in the 2026 Polar Plunge to raise funds for River Hospital! I’ve been repeatedly assured by medical professionals, event organizers, and people who Googled it that I will not die.
But if I do, please know it was for a noble cause. I sacrificed myself for community health, hypothermia awareness, and the undeniable rush of bad decisions made for charity. In that extremely unlikely event, I respectfully request a Viking funeral.
Until then, your donation will help support River Hospital and make my icy plunge slightly more worth it. Donate generously. If not for the cause, then to encourage me to go all the way in.