I was having a great and smooth pregnancy with Lainey. Nothing out of the normal for all my appointments. My 4-year-old son and 2-year-old daughter were so excited to meet their new sibling. I still find myself having daydreams about the sweet moments I will forever cherish of my two living children loving on their mama’s belly with excitement for what they thought was to come.
At 33 weeks pregnant I got COVID. It was terrible! I have never felt more awful in my life. The worst part was because I had covid I was denied appointments at my OB’s office. The question was “do you feel movement?” and the answer was “yes I did”. I tried to remain calm and focus on getting better. I started to feel better with each passing day but quickly panic started to set in. I just felt like something wasn’t right. I called the office again and I was told to eat a heavy protein diet, drink some caffeine and try to sit still to see how much movement I could get. I was to report back to them in two hours. Both of my children were home with me as I tried to quietly lay on the couch to focus on baby movements. I swear I felt a couple of kicks in those two hours but maybe in the moment I just wanted to feel movements. Again talking to the office and expressing more concern, my doctor decided I should to be seen asap. She sent me directly to the hospital given my situation and technically still being Covid positive at the time.
Little did I know my life was about to forever change. The most awful words were said to me as I sat alone in the hospital, “I’m sorry but I can’t find the heartbeat”. I thought for sure it was a mistake and that maybe a doctor or someone else would be able to find it. But a few minutes later I was told again, “I’m sorry but I can’t find the heartbeat”. I lost part of me that day along with Lainey. Both of my living children were cesarean births, so my husband and I decided to go that route instead of laboring for who knows how long. In my mind, we were going back for surgery to save my daughter. I kept waiting to hear her cry but unfortunately Lainey had already passed in utero. Our OB said there
were signs of the cord being wrapped around her neck but not enough to say that was the reason of death. We sent the placenta off and got an autopsy done on Lainey. No abnormal signs were found so the only answers we were able to walk away with were that the placenta showed similar signs of an infection (Covid).
Recovering from a c-section is hard but recovering from a third c-section with no newborn to love on was extremely challenging physically and emotionally. We had a great team at the hospital, and I will never forget the kind of care that my OB and nurses gave to us during our short visit. They walked us through the tough decision on how and where to lay our baby to rest. They encouraged us to hold her and spend as much time as we needed with our angel baby. Leaving the hospital empty handed was depressing and lonely. Ryan and I are so blessed to have such an amazing family and friends that helped us through our darkest days. Their kindness and love really
helped our healing process. Lainey’s life will live on through us as we strive to help other families not experience this awful tragedy.
We look forward to honoring her life on October 2nd at Lainey's Lap of Love along with many other babies that have their own story and were gone way too soon.
-Brittany Mitchell, Lainey’s Mom