12 years ago my family began a journey that we thought would be the amazing experience. Little did we know within 3 years our lives would be devastated by mental, emotional and psychological abuse - essentially domestic violence. In the beginning, things just seemed a little off. But as time went on the abuse continued, we became mere shells of ourselves, simply surviving. As with most DV victims we became quiet about our homelife, we withdrew, stopped having most friends over - especially the kids - how do you explain the things going on in your home to people. Our lives became very isolated. Sure we went to church and school functions and "performed" as if nothing was askew, but it was an act. Honestly, we couldn't really even describe what was going on in our home, it was just "below the surface". After about 7 years, we were ready to give up and were thrown a lifeline by a counselor. We were told the "issue" within our family was something called reactive atachment disorder (RAD). I thought getting this information would change everything! I was so wrong. The next years were spent researching and searching for help. There was nothing out there! No one really knew what RAD was and no one could offer any help, including our post-adoptions worker. Ironically, I reached out to a private "underground group" on Facebook for help and was advised to contact Amy at RAD Advocates. I locked myself in the bathroom and fired off an email. I could not believe when she emailed back and validated EVERYTHING that was happening in our home! With the help of Amy and RAD Advocates, I was able to "fight" our state for proper help for our child with RAD. Once we "won" we spent lots of money getting our child to this proper treatment (it is incredibly expensive - think college tuition every month. Once we were "on the other side" and had begun (it is really never done) healing from all the trauma I knew there was NO WAY I could sit by and let another family suffer the way our family had. 18 months ago, I was blessed to become a volunteer with RAD Advocates! I have never had a more fullfilling experience and cannot imagine life with RAD without RAD Advocates! I share all of this we are NOT the usual family. MOST families of children with RAD never get the help them need. It is heartbreaking and needs to CHANGE. Thank you so much for your help!