Life is a marathon, and so is MS.  During a marathon, people talk about hitting the wall, when everything is depleted, and you feel like you can't move forward.  Sometimes with MS, that is what it can feel like.  There are days when you hit a wall, and experience a tiredness that is almost hard to put into words.  Where various pains exist in your body where any movement feels difficult.  When walking, talking, or even thinking feels like it is happening in cement. Sometimes the depression of dealing with this chronic illness hits my soul like a cement wall.  But I know that I need to keep moving forward: for my kids, for my family, for my friends and for myself. 

Just like the hit the wall moments, there are the moments of exhilaration like completing another mile: having a successful day at work, being able to watch the joy in my children's faces as they are performing on stage or playing sports, having the support of friends and family cheering me on every step of the way. 

During the 2021 marathon, as we were coming up on the northern part of Central Park, there were people "hitting the wall" around me and starting to walk, and one of the Road Runner pacers said, "think of who you are running this for, think of the person that is sitting in a hospital wishing they could be running this race right now", and I knew everyone that I was running for at that moment.  I was running for the fellow warriors in the infusion room with me each month; for those struggling with various symptoms without a diagnosis yet, and for my children, who I have hope with every cell in my body that we will find a vaccine or cure for MS and other chronic illnesses before they have to experience something like this as an adult for them or someone else that they love.  And when I crossed that finish line, I knew that I was also crossing it for me on my MS journey.  The accomplishment was for the person I was in my 20s, the person I am today, and the person that I will continue to be.